How do we love our friends on Facebook? It is a new tool, so I’m not sure we have the answers we need to this important question. But with over a billion users, when Christians participate on Facebook, they should do so in a way that honors God and serves their friends. Why? Because we are called to be salt and light wherever we are (see Matthew 5:13-16).
It is time to be creative, intentional, and prayerful in how we use this website.
So here are 60+ suggestions for how to love your friends on Facebook:
- Read 1 Corinthians 13 before logging into Facebook.
- Spend five minutes praying for everyone who shows up in your Newsfeed when you login.
- Make sure your profile is honest, real, and truthful. Exaggerating who you are creates unrealistic standards for everyone else.
- Use Facebook to raise money for good causes.
- Avoid posting mean photos, status updates, or other content about your friends. Ask yourself: would I want someone to post this about me?
- Spend a few extra minutes to tag your friends in photos.
- Err on the side of hitting the “Like” button too often. Celebrate the good updates in the lives of your friends.
- Avoid complaining (Philippians 2:14). And, from time to time, share appropriate weaknesses or struggles.
- Use profile details to pray more specifically for your friends.
- Have fun.
- Check Snopes.com before posting sensational rumors or ideas. It is your responsibility to, as much as possible, avoid spreading false information.
- Download the best images from a friend’s profile and use them to make a homemade note of appreciation for your friend.
- Discourage the use of cheesy Christian “art,” images, or jokes. This does not build our credibility with others or represent Christ well. Christian spam is the worst kind of spam.
- Do use Facebook to spread the word about great art, beautiful pictures, excellent writing, and so on.
- Write an encouraging note on a friend’s wall.
- Do not get into a debate about your beliefs if you do not know what you are talking about. Humbly say, “You know, I need to do my homework on that” and then go do some serious reading and study until you are well informed on the topic.
- When people ask a question, go out of your way to give them a really great answer.
- Develop new friendships in the first place. Facebook can connect you with friends from around the world.
- Promote your friends’ stuff – their concert, art show, nonprofit organization, etc.
- Wish people “Happy Birthday!” Take a minute to see what is going on in their lives – then pray for them, write a note of encouragement, or invite them to get coffee.
- In general: do what is right and avoid doing what is wrong.
- Talk about your Facebook use with an accountability partner and mentor. How much time do you spend on Facebook each day? How emotionally invested are you in it? Did your activity on the site lead you into sin? How did you use Facebook to serve others?
- Do a “Facebook audit” every few months. Check your profile for accuracy, honesty, and reality.
- Remember that a diverse group of people will read your status updates: keep all of your friends in mind. Avoid being unintentionally (or intentionally!) offensive. Ask: would I still say this if I was having lunch with them?
- Don’t bash people, use stereotypes, or say hateful things. If you’re not sure about posting something, just avoid it.
- Take occasional breaks from Facebook and dedicate that time to seeing friends in real life.
- Don’t take on the role of “Facebook police”: this strategy doesn’t work.
- Ask “What would Jesus do?”
- Always tell the truth.
- Use Facebook to invite people to worthwhile events and experiences.
- Avoid narcissism and pettiness. Elevate the conversation.
- Be both gracious and firm in responding to disagreement or rudeness. If things get really heated, follow-up in person. Set fair boundaries with bullies.
- Forgive people when they hurt you through their actions on Facebook.
- Join groups and Pages that help you grow. Subscribe to the status updates of inspirational people. (For instance, try out the Christian Apologetics Alliance, a group which has been very influential in my life).
- Counterbalance your use of Facebook with time spent serving others.
- Don’t steal people’s content, but give credit when you re-post from someone else.
- Avoid the temptation to use Facebook to further lust or impurity. Aspire to high standards when discerning what photos to look at or upload.
- Post links to especially thoughtful and clear explanations of a Christian perspective on current events.
- Ask interesting questions and create great conversations.
- Don’t waste time on Facebook games or apps (see Psalm 90:12).
- When angry, log off until you’ve cooled down. Don’t take revenge.
- Speak up for what is right. Be bold.
- Listen to others at least as much as you share about yourself.
- Learn from the constructive feedback you get from people on Facebook so that it can mature you as a person.
- Study the profile and updates of people who are seeking after God or who have another faith or worldview. Carefully and prayerfully consider: how could I build trust with this friend?
- Don’t use Facebook at work (see Colossians 3:23-24).
- Don’t measure your self-worth by the number of your friends or the number of ‘likes’ that a post gets. (See Psalm 139:14-16, Romans 12:3)
- Use wisdom in deciding who you subscribe to and who you unfollow.
- When Facebook reminds you of an old friend, drop a short note in the mail to them.
- Delete photos or comments you’ve posted that, upon reflection, are not appropriate or loving.
- Do not post anything to Facebook that you are not comfortable being forever available to anyone. Think about what your spouse, kids, or employer might find one day! Use Facebook today in a way that is responsible for your future relationships.
- Have a purposefulness to your use of Facebook. Ask: why do I use Facebook? Be intentional.
- When something is truly funny or encouraging (and not lame!), share it with a few friends to cheer them up.
- Fight against the tendency towards vanity and pursue humility. Post more about others than about yourself. Don’t brag.
- With friends (don’t be a stalker!) ask follow-up questions about what they posted on Facebook when you see them in person.
- Find ways to genuinely honor your friends through your comments on their pages.
- Give people the benefit of the doubt when interpreting their actions on the site.
- Don’t take yourself and your ‘personal branding’ too seriously.
- Use Facebook to figure out the perfect gift for people’s birthdays, graduation parties, housewarming parties, Christmas, etc.
- Be willing to apologize when you make a mistake.
- Advocate for the poor and the marginalized.
- Surprise people with your commitment to friendship.
- Practice gratitude for the positive ways that Facebook connects you to friends and community.
- Share this post with your friends. :-)
Have more ideas? I would love to add to this list. Please share your suggestions at the Reasons for God Facebook page!